Are you self-questioning, “Do I have abandonment issues?” This quiz uses trauma and attachment style analysis to discover if you’re afraid of being abandoned.
A Genuine Abandonment Issues Quiz
The test is a set of psychological questions to expose your overwhelming fear of losing closed ones. It helps you self-report emotions and concerns to analyze the validity of your attachment style or dependency in relationships.
The premise of the abandonment issues quiz is similar to that of the trust issues test. It’s designed to help you discover co-dependency, insecurity, or irrational fears of being inadequate.
Things That the Test Considers
One of the early signs of abandonment issues is self-questioning things like, “Am I lovely?” That’s because the person feels unlovable and worthy of being deserted by others. However, that’s not the only factor our quiz considers. We analyze three affecting elements to come up with precise and reliable results: The way your parents treated you as a child, abusive or toxic relationships in early childhood, and your current symptoms.
Here’s what to know about each.
Psychologists believe that the connection between a child and their parents can lead to further mental issues such as fear of abandonment. Children who’ve gone through the anxiety of losing parents or being ignored by them are more prone to struggle with trust and attachment issues in the future. That’s why the quiz looks into your relationship with your mom and dad to finetune the results.
Divorce, loss, and emotional abuse can also cause abandonment issues. So, another important factor in the test is the possible childhood traumas you’ve experienced. (But beware that we do not require you to give details about your memories as we respect your privacy).
Behavioral symptoms of abandonment issues.
It’s crucial to know the symptoms before answering a question like, “Do I have abandonment issues?” The quiz guides you through a semi-diagnostic process so that you can self-report your symptoms. It might be complicated to do that on your own. But the questions here are designed to be comprehensive and easy to understand.
7 Undeniable Signs You Have Abandonment Issues
Taking a genuine online quiz is the best way of discovering your abandonment issues. But it’s understandable if you’re not a fan of that. Some prefer to look for the symptoms and conclude on their own. If that’s the case, here’s a list of common signs you have a fear of losing loved ones or being deserted.
#1. You are a people-pleaser.
Instead of asking, “Do I have abandonment issues?” try this: Am I a people-pleaser? If yes, you are probably afraid of being inadequate and worthy of rejection. If pleasing others is your priority and you go out of your way to make them happy, you have an attachment issue that needs to be addressed.
#2. You struggle with insecurity.
Another question to ask yourself is, “Am I insecure?” If yes, you are likely to have irrational fears of being abandoned. People with insecurity feel unworthy of love and, therefore, prepare themselves for rejection and betrayal.
#3. You have trust issues.
It’s difficult for a person with abandonment issues to believe in others because they can leave or disappear at any time. So, excessive distrust is also another sign you should be looking for.
#4. You are reserved and private.
Your abandonment issues cause a general distrust towards others. So, you don’t open up to others and avoid expressing your genuine emotions around them. That’s a defense mechanism, though. It helps you feel safe in case people reject or leave you.
#5. You abandon others.
It may sound strange, but individuals with abandonment issues often reject others. It’s rooted in fear of losing them in the future, though. You leave others behind because you’re scared of getting used to their presence and not being able to cope with their loss.
#6. You stay with toxic people.
Since it’s hard to imagine you’re worthy of love, you let toxic people remain in your life. That’s because you’re afraid of losing the last person who claims to love you. (It’s a false belief, though).
#7. You move on too quickly.
It sounds impossible to deal with a breakup when you have abandonment issues. So, you move on quickly and replace people as fast as possible to ease the pain.
What if the Abandonment Issue Quiz Result was Positive?
It’s okay to be afraid of losing your loved ones—we all have some sort of similar anxiety. But if it’s as severe as an abandonment issue, you can try the following steps to change for the better.
Seek professional help
Cognitive-behavioral therapy is your best bet. You can talk to a therapist about your fears and anxiety and address them properly. Other options, such as DBT, can help you manage your emotions and learn how to deal with them.
The fact that you asked yourself, “Do I have abandonment issues?” is a good sign. It indicates that you want to be self-aware of your possible mental struggles. Being aware of your emotions and understanding where they come from can ease the pain and give you the power to overcome them.
You’re worthy of love. Abandonment issues might make you feel otherwise. But you have to practice loving yourself and caring for yourself. That’s how you can lower the sounds in your head trying to tell you that you’re not adequate.
Disclaimer: Read Before Participating
The abandonment issues quiz is not a diagnostic test. It’s a self-report questionnaire to help people wonder if they have an irrational fear of losing loved ones.
Questions of the quiz
- Question 1
Which one sounds like something you'd like to keep your friends or family happy about?
Try to be there when they need me
Change my attitude and be the one they love
Always telling the truth no matter what
I think they wouldn't be happy no matter what I do.
- Question 2
How would you feel if a toxic partner abandoned you and ended the relationship?
I'd feel fine because they were toxic anyway
I'd feel broken and unlovable regardless
I would never be able to trust others
I think I'm used to it, and I'd feel numb
- Question 3
What are you insecure about?
I don't think I'm insecure.
About my appearance and personality
About my capabilities and skills
About my current relationship or partner
- Question 4
How easy is it for you to trust others, especially in romantic relationships?
It's usually easy
It's quite challenging
It's nearly impossible
I trust easily. But my partner never trusts me.
- Question 5
Have you ever abandoned a relationship because you were too afraid of losing that person in the future?
No, that doesn't make any sense
Yes, I've done that
No, but I think people would do that to me
No, but someone did that to me
- Question 6
How easy is it for you to show your vulnerable and insecure side to your lover?
I'd say it's somewhat easy (but it depends)
I can never show my imperfections to others
I feel like people might turn against me if I do that
It's easy for me. But my partner is always secretive and private.
- Question 7
How often do you feel like you're unlovable?
Rarely or never
All the time, because I AM
Someone told me I'm unlovable. So…
- Question 8
Have you ever tried to fix a toxic relationship because you were afraid of a breakup?
No, I don't do that
Yes, I cling to my relationships
No, I usually run away as soon as I see a red flag
No, but someone wanted me to do that
- Question 9
Which one sounds like the way your parents treated you?
With respect (mostly)
They never cared for me
They lied to me about everything
They made me feel like I was unlovable
- Question 10
What was your parents' reaction when you needed them emotionally?
They were always there for me
They left me alone and ignored me
They thought I was lying
They humiliated me
- Question 11
Do you think it's pointless and stupid to show your true feelings to others?
No, you should always express yourself
Yes, no one cares anyway
Yes, no one believes you anyway
Someone told me that I shouldn't express my feelings.
- Question 12
How much do you love yourself? Give an honest answer.
I love and respect myself a lot
I'm not worthy of love or attention
I think self-love is just a lie
I used to love myself more
- Question 13
How quickly do you start a new relationship after a breakup?
It takes me some time to do that
It's almost impossible for me to move on
It takes some time for me. But my ex moved on immediately.
- Question 14
Have you ever felt like you could not live without your partner?
No, that's not a healthy thought
Yes, it happens with all my relationships
Yes, but I never let others know
No, but my partner feels that way
- Question 15
"It's smart not to rely on people because it would hurt less when they're gone." Do you agree with that?
No, that's a toxic attitude.
Yes, that's my strategy.
I think it makes sense
No, but someone I know thinks that way
- Question 16
Did you go through a loss as a kid?
No, I didn't experience that
Yes, I lost a loved one
No, but I was afraid of losing my loved ones
No, but my parents manipulated me with the fear of losing them
- Question 17
Did your parents get a divorce when you were a kid?
They didn't. But they were always fighting
They divorced when I was young/adult
- Question 18
Which one describes your feeling towards your parents?
I love them
I don't think they love me
I don't trust them
Our relationship is complicated
- Question 19
How easy is it for you to ask for someone's help when you're emotionally in pain?
It's fairly easy
It used to be easier
- Question 20
Final question; what do you think would happen if your partner saw your vulnerable and insecure side?
They'd get to know me better
They'd dump me
They'd not believe me
It would turn into a messy situation