Is it an obsession or true love? This Obsessive Love Disorder Test reveals the true nature of your emotions based on your behaviors in relationships.
What Is OLD and How to Diagnose It?
In his book, Colors of Love, John Alan Lee, a Canadian Psychologist, writes, “Mania is a type of love described as possessive or obsessive, [and it can] lead to extreme jealousy and codependency.” But as a disorder, OLD is when a person becomes obsessed with another individual they believe they are in love with.
You cannot find Obsessive Love Disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. So, it’s not a diagnostic condition. But psychologists use other co-occurring disorders such as BPD or OCD to diagnose a patient with OLD.
|Obsessive Love Disorder||Possessiveness and obsession with another person.|
|Erotomania||Believing that a celebrity is madly in love with you.|
|Codependence||The need to be needed in a relationship|
|Jealousy||Feeling insecure and apprehensive about being abandoned|
Obsessive Love Disorder Test Explained
It’s a 20-question self-report questionnaire that reveals if you are obsessed with another person. The test is also capable of determining your obsession’s stage and its possible causes.
Like the Attachment Style Test, your experiences, behaviors, and emotions are analyzed to deliver the most accurate results.
Find Out If and Why You’re Obsessed with Someone
“Am I in love, or is it obsession?” you might ask. And the test objectively analyzes your emotions to answer that. Sometimes, it’s challenging to draw between pure affection and toxic fascination. But you could at least ensure your feelings are not worrying with the help of a genuine questionnaire.
See If It’s Caused by Your Attachment Style
The actual cause of Obsessive Love Disorder is not clear—as it may vary from one patient to another. But psychologists suggest that your attachment theory explains why someone fixates on others.
The following conditions could lead to OLD or worsen it in most cases. And the test can expose which one might be accompanying your condition.
Disinhibited Social Engagement is an attachment style that results in excessive friendliness, talkativeness, and outgoingness around strangers. People with DED are likely to also grow obsessive behaviors over time and struggle with OLD.
An individual with Reactive Attachment Disorder is unable or unwilling to form meaningful bonds. Therefore, they might superimpose an idealized image on another person and become obsessed with it.
The combination of Borderline Personality Disorder and OLD could be dangerous. A BPD patient has an unstable self-image and goes through mood swings all the time. Therefore, they might switch emotions between love and hate towards the same person.
Although not an attachment style, Relationship Obsessive Compulsive Disorder could also be the reason behind one’s obsession; in this case, the patient might centralize their attention and compulsive rituals on their relationship. And that could lead to unhealthy behaviors such as possessiveness and control.
Discover Your OLD Stage
A perk of participating in Obsessive Love Disorder is that you realize how bad your condition is. According to Dr. John D. Moore’s work, Confusing Love with Obsession, “OLD takes place or forms in four different stages: Attraction, anxiety, obsession, and destruction.” Here’s what to know about each.
#1. Attraction Phase
During this initial stage, the person with OLD starts idealizing another individual. Daydreaming and fantasizing about that particular person are common signs of the “Attraction Phase” taking place.
#2. Anxious Phase
The second stage is usually when the patient themselves might ask questions like, “Am I obsessed with someone?” It includes growing anxiety and fear of abandonment which encourage possessive behaviors.
#3. Obsession Phase
The third stage of Obsessive Love Disorder is when love turns into extreme jealousy, neediness, and compulsive actions.
#4. Destructive Phase
A person with OLD is often filled with self-hate and insecurity. And at the fourth stage of their obsession, this self-hate turns into anger, which leads to physical or emotional abuse.
Red Flags that the OLD Quiz Looks for
Our test looks for six main symptoms of Obsessive Love Disorder to finetune the results.
“They need to be needed” is called codependency or relationship addiction. Interestingly, another term for OLD is love addiction. And most psychologists believe that the two conditions are interconnected. Therefore, the test includes a mini codependency quiz to see how addicted you are to your romantic relationships before generating the real results.
Obsessive Love Disorder might cause paranoia-like thoughts in the patients. So, they might become overprotective and impulsive, thinking that their love is in constant danger. That’s another red flag the test considers to evaluate your condition.
The OLD test wants to know if you control or monitor your lover. You’re most likely obsessed with them if you do, and it’s not love.
Do you subconsciously try to own your partner? If yes, you have Obsessive Love Disorder. That’s another red flag the test takes into account—and it’s crucial to identify your disorder’s stage.
A common question among people with OLD is, “Am I jealous?” Most of them believe their compulsive behaviors are only caused by jealousy, so there’s nothing to worry about. However, their actions are far beyond what a slightly jealous lover would do.
Stalking your partner or restraining their social interactions are signs of having Obsessive Love Disorder. You might even try to make your partner feel guilty for not spending their whole time with you. So, that’s another red flag the quiz analyzes for better results.
Who Should Take the Obsessive Love Disorder Test?
Since it’s in self-report format, only genuine individuals who want to know if they have OLD would benefit from the test results. You could easily cheat on the test to avoid exposing your actual emotions. But that would be pointless. The goal of the questionnaire is to help you face your possible personality disorders. And you’re better off without it if you’re not ready.
What If the Test Result Was Positive?
You should seek professional help. Fortunately, OLD is manageable through cognitive therapy and medications. It’s best to consult a psychologist or a psychiatrist if your test result is positive. They can help you figure out if you actually have Obsessive Love Disorder and how to deal with it.
The Obsessive Love Disorder Test is not diagnostic. Although it’s based on the latest research and findings on the condition, you still need to consult a psychologist for a clinical diagnosis.
Questions of the quiz
- Question 1
What made you think of taking an Obsessive Love Disorder test?
I just want to have some fun
I feel like there’s something wrong with me
Someone asked me to do it
I feel like someone’s obsessed with me
- Question 2
Which one describes your biggest fear in a relationship?
My partner cheating on me
My partner dumping me
Not being able to see my partner for a while
Being restricted by my partner
- Question 3
Do you feel the need to protect your loved one from the outside world and other people?
Not really. But I’m always there for them.
No, but I feel like that’s actually my problem
Yes, being protective is my love language.
No, but my partner feels that way and tries to protect me.
- Question 4
Do you believe that true love means submitting to your relationship?
No, that’d be toxic
No, but I think that’s why no one loves me.
Yes, submission is another word for commitment.
No, but my partner thinks that way.
- Question 5
“Becoming possessive of a person is actually a love language.” What do you think about that quote?
No, it’s called being a freak.
I’m not sure about the answer.
Yes, it’s definitely my love language.
My partner thinks that’s true.
- Question 6
How would you rate your self-esteem?
My self-esteem was higher before meeting my partner.
- Question 7
Do you love yourself? What’s your idea of self-love?
Yes, I think self-love is an essential part of a relationship.
I don’t love myself because nobody has ever loved me.
I can only love one person, and that will not be me.
I do love myself. But my partner doesn’t believe in self-love.
- Question 8
Which one describes your relationship with your parents better?
They love me unconditionally
They’ve always ignored me and my emotions
They humiliated and abused me
They say they love me, but I don’t believe them.
- Question 9
Is it difficult for you to concentrate because you’re constantly fantasizing about someone else?
No, that sounds extreme.
Yes, but I only create fake tragic scenarios in my head.
Yes, I can’t stop thinking of my crush/partner.
No, but my partner is constantly fantasizing about me.
- Question 10
Do you need to check your partner’s phone and go through their messages?
No, that sounds insecure
No, but I’m fine if they want to check mine.
Yes, I have to make sure I’m with a loyal person.
No, but my partner constantly spies on me.
- Question 11
What could make you jealous of your partner?
Flirting with others or something along those lines.
Nothing. I’m not jealous at all.
Anything could trigger my jealousy because I love them so much.
I’m not really jealous. But my partner is super-jealous of me.
- Question 12
Is it easy for you to define your own emotions and needs outside of your relationship?
Yes, it’s pretty easy.
Yes, but I never talk about my needs.
No. All I think about is my partner’s needs.
Yes, but my partner is usually against them.
- Question 13
Do you believe that your partner should give you all their attention to prove their love for you?
No, I’m not a needy person.
No, but I’m willing to give them mine.
Yes, that’s called being love.
No, but my partner believes in that.
- Question 14
How challenging is it for you to stay away from your lover and give them some space?
It’s not challenging at all.
It’s a bit challenging because I feel lonely.
It’s impossible. I can’t live without my life.
It’s not challenging for me. But my partner can’t handle it.
- Question 15
Do you go through uncontrollable rages? If yes, how do you express them?
No, my anger is controlled
No, I never express my anger
Yes, I mess up everything and then feel bad about it.
No, but my partner has that. And it scares me.
- Question 16
How would you react, or what would you do if your partner decided to dump you?
I’d feel bad but not broken or done
I’d feel numb because I always expect the worst
I’d feel broken, and I’d never be the same person again.
I’d feel okay. But my partner would freak out if I did that.
- Question 17
How often are you nervous about being left alone, and what does it feel like?
It doesn’t happen often.
I’m often worried about that. It feels horrible.
I’m worried about that all the time. It feels irritating.
I’m not worried about that, but my partner is.
- Question 18
Which one describes your fantasies about your date or your crush?
I usually have sexual fantasies about them.
I often have tragic and sad fantasies.
I see them as a god or goddess in my fantasies.
I don’t fantasize about them anymore.
- Question 19
Would you be able to live a normal life and move on after a breakup?
Yes, I’d definitely be able to do that.
IDK, I’m too weak for that.
I would never get over it.
Yes, I’d be fine. But my partner couldn't handle it.
- Question 20
Final question; do you trust your partner?
Yes, of course.
I think so.
No, I don’t trust anyone.
Yes, but my partner doesn’t trust me.